Negative self-talk and positive self-talk... both have such a gigantic effect on our confidence and performance!
Soon after I was born, a little red spot appeared on my right cheek and started to grow. It got bigger and bigger and was flashy red within a short period of time.
Every single person who saw me commented: «Oh noo, what happened to this baby?» or «Oh my gosh, what is THAT?» The doctors already told my mom: «We have to cut this out!»
Then an elderly midwife saw me and immediately said: «That’s a nice hemangioma there! NO worries, this will grow for one year and then fade away on itself over time. You don’t have to do anything!»
That was the kind of information my mother wanted to hear. She wasn’t concerned since the beginning, but now she was completely calm.
She stayed cool with every comment and didn’t care at all, that she had «an ugly» child.
I am so freaking grateful that she didn’t transferred any negative feelings to me on my way into the future. Not one negative thought was implanted in me! I mean, she could have hidden me or somehow cover the red cheek up or begin to cry every time somebody said something mean or inconsiderate!
She didn’t care a second and that was so powerful!
I never had an issue with my blemish! How cool is that, right? It really got smaller and smaller over the years. If it’s really hot outside or in winter really cold, sometimes people I know for years all of the sudden say: Oh, did a bee sting you? The winter version: Do you have a frostbite here? When I explain they are always so astonished: Whaat, you had that all the time?
I’m so sure, that the coolness of my mother did magic to my self-esteem, at least, concerning this issue.
Well I’m not free of negative self-talk: «My belly is too wobbly, my thighs are too fat, my skin is so freaking pale you can see through ...!» but I always decide that I immediately stop myself! STOP!
What helps me is the thought: Would I dare to comment on a friends body like that? NOPE! Never ever.
So that’s the check: Whatever you or I would not tell a friend: DON’T tell yourself!
If you are complaining about your body and you can change something about it: GO and DO it! Complaining never helps! Action does. Take full responsibility for your health and body. But again, with lots of loooove like you coach a friend to change things up, ok?
If you have things you can’t change on your body like my hemangioma, make peace with it! The change lays in your mindset. You can decide how you think about this flaw or “problem” about your body. Yes, you can! Every time you say something mean to yourself: Stop and change the comment to something nice and empowering! You have to train yourself, like when you tell a little child over and over again: Don’t say rude things to your friends, say something nice! Don’t hit your sister with the shovel in the sandpit, get along please.
Be nice to yourself, send love, become your best friend. You are with you together 24/7, no break, so wouldn’t it be nice to treat yourself as the queen or king you are? YES! Thank you! Thank you, that you decide right here and now to do better and to go all in with being kind, empowering and NICE to yourself!
If you want to create more niceness and JOY in your life, sign up for the free Joy Challenge. The feedback I get from that which makes me the happiest is: I didn’t know how easy it is to create more joy for myself! YES, it is! Sign up here!
Did you fill out the JOYOMETER for last week? I’ll always hand it over to you week by week so that I can someday convince you, that this “little review” of your week is pure gold!